When we really think about it, there is one thing we all want in our life- happiness, and sustainable happiness at that. We all want our happiness to last a lifetime so that we feel we have lived a fulfilling life.
What is the meaning of sustainable happiness?
Now, when we talk about happiness that can be sustained, do we talk about feeling enjoyment, excitement, and peace all the time? Actually, that is not the case. Instead, we’re talking about experiencing a life that is rich and meaningful to us.
Sustainable happiness isn’t about being happy at all times, because we can never hold onto one emotion throughout all our life! However, experiencing all sorts of emotions- even unpleasant ones- allows us to have a rich life full of meaning. So, feeling pain doesn’t equal a failed attempt at being happy!
What makes happiness sustainable?
By knowing what “stops” us from achieving sustainable happiness, we can begin moving along the path of improving the relevant skills!
Below are some obstacles to sustainable happiness, adapted from theories of ACT (Acceptance Commitment Therapy).
1. Experiential Avoidance
When we have this obstacle in the way of our sustainable happiness, we’re not willing to accept our unpleasant internal experiences. In other words, we avoid distressing emotions, thoughts, memories, and situations.
Ironically, this harms us significantly in the long run.
You actually might not be happy, because you want to sustain pleasant feelings so badly!
2. Cognitive Fusion
This is another obstacle that might make it harder for us to find sustainable happiness. Basically, we start to believe whatever our mind tells us. This becomes problematic when we listen to our own negative thoughts about who we are! When we do this, our experiences become very limited, because we avoid the situations our mind tells us to.
That is to say, believing in the content of our thoughts no matter what, will lead to a cycle of unhelpful behaviors.
3. Living in the past or the future
Mindfulness is one of the greatest skills for overcoming this obstacle. When we live in the past or the future, we tend to ignore the experiences we’re having “today and now”.
It’s okay to occasionally think about the past or dream about the future, but we should be careful not to get stuck in these activities. After all, the best time to live is now. Giving up “now” and “today” stops us from creating changes and living the life we deserve!
4. Not sticking to values
What exactly are “values”? Everything that matters to us deeply, and all the things that we want to work towards, can be classified as our values. Russ Harris defines values as “a compass” that leads us where we want to go in life. This compass helps us avoid getting lost, and the goals we have on the way spice up our journey, giving it purpose and meaning.
In this experience we explain how choosing goals that aren’t in line with your values will lead to more frustration. In addition, we guide you through a step-by-step plan on how to choose the best goals for you, and stick to them.
5. Not being committed
Developing sustainable happiness skills takes practice. Just like how you need practice to strengthen your muscles, you need practice and commitment for baking your self-happiness, too!
How to overcome sustainable happiness obstacles
Here we have a small activity that can help us achieve this. Raising inner awareness for these obstacles is the first step towards overcoming them!
For each of the 5 barriers above, rate yourself:
1- I don’t do this at all – this isn’t an obstacle for me
2- I sometimes do this – this can be an obstacle for me
3- I always do this – this is the biggest obstacle for me
The Role of Happiness-19 in Sustainable Happiness
Happiness-19 is a digital vitamin for sustainable happiness.
With multiple creative tools and skillsets, Happiness-19 helps you develop a solid plan to find sustainable happiness – we will be there to support you by developing customized plans for the long-term practice of self-happiness skills so that you’ll stay committed. After all, it’s always easier to stay committed with the help of a friend!
